Light Up My Life... girl...
Good afternoon.. woke up couple of hours ago and now I'm blogging. Actually, I've just went up to friendster to have a look. I looked my photos... and felt terrible. Basically, I hate myself for looking so good. Frankly, speaking, it seems that my looks have been a threat to any girls who would wanna know me... i guess. It's been some time now that I realized.. that having the looks is the oldest form of tradition in getting a date. I ripped off one of my best-looking photos and put in a funny photo, at least not looking at my best.
Damn! The whole night till now, I have this strong feeliing of loneliness. It's not the kind of loneliness that is the feeling of being left out or Godless living. I know God is with me all the time and He's there when I'm down and out. But sometimes, I just need to be alone. And whenever such feelings come, I hate it. The emptiness... the missing joy... is somewhat far away.
It's been years ever since the one I cherished broke my heart and left. To tell you the truth, I feel stupid. I feel like a dumbass even I've gotten over the whole thing. It's also years since I've tried to distract myself from hoping for someone new. Yet, I failed time and time again, and all the time, I kept thinking about it, kept hoping for it, praying for it, doing stupid things like researching on attractions and psychologies and stuffs. In fact, I've always held on to my belief that my dream will be a reality very soon. And this faith I have is always on the rocks. I would always go all out to achieve my dream. And this dream, is one of my dreams, which I am about to give up hope on. Yea, yea... I say that now, but I'll say that again someday soon.
Resolution number one: - Find some ways of getting extra income this year. I wanna fulfill my wish list and all my material desires. I wanna earn lots and lots of money because now I believe. Money is POWER. It can buy lots of pleasures.
Resolution number two: - Get my fitness back on track. I've been sick for a long time now. I wanna be fit again just like before. Once fit, forever fit! That's my encouraging motto I gave myself this year.
Resolution number three: - I wanna improve on my social skills. I need them all the time. So I just have to start somewhere. I don't know where, but right now is the time. I'll read up on lots and lots of books to tell a person from head to toe, interact and deal with people as well.
Resolution forever: - Form a LEGACY. Everyone has a legacy. But it all boils down to the type of legacy one desires to fulfill. My Legacy that I have in my vision, is a legacy that my decendants would speak proudly about.
As for looking for someone special, I think I should stop looking. She's late, TERRIBLY LATE!!! I guess pretty soon, I'll turn my ambitious resolutions into obsession, if the light of my tunnel becomes pitch dark!
CAN SOMEONE JUST LIGHT UP MY FUCKING LIFE!!!!!
Damn! The whole night till now, I have this strong feeliing of loneliness. It's not the kind of loneliness that is the feeling of being left out or Godless living. I know God is with me all the time and He's there when I'm down and out. But sometimes, I just need to be alone. And whenever such feelings come, I hate it. The emptiness... the missing joy... is somewhat far away.
It's been years ever since the one I cherished broke my heart and left. To tell you the truth, I feel stupid. I feel like a dumbass even I've gotten over the whole thing. It's also years since I've tried to distract myself from hoping for someone new. Yet, I failed time and time again, and all the time, I kept thinking about it, kept hoping for it, praying for it, doing stupid things like researching on attractions and psychologies and stuffs. In fact, I've always held on to my belief that my dream will be a reality very soon. And this faith I have is always on the rocks. I would always go all out to achieve my dream. And this dream, is one of my dreams, which I am about to give up hope on. Yea, yea... I say that now, but I'll say that again someday soon.
Resolution number one: - Find some ways of getting extra income this year. I wanna fulfill my wish list and all my material desires. I wanna earn lots and lots of money because now I believe. Money is POWER. It can buy lots of pleasures.
Resolution number two: - Get my fitness back on track. I've been sick for a long time now. I wanna be fit again just like before. Once fit, forever fit! That's my encouraging motto I gave myself this year.
Resolution number three: - I wanna improve on my social skills. I need them all the time. So I just have to start somewhere. I don't know where, but right now is the time. I'll read up on lots and lots of books to tell a person from head to toe, interact and deal with people as well.
Resolution forever: - Form a LEGACY. Everyone has a legacy. But it all boils down to the type of legacy one desires to fulfill. My Legacy that I have in my vision, is a legacy that my decendants would speak proudly about.
As for looking for someone special, I think I should stop looking. She's late, TERRIBLY LATE!!! I guess pretty soon, I'll turn my ambitious resolutions into obsession, if the light of my tunnel becomes pitch dark!
CAN SOMEONE JUST LIGHT UP MY FUCKING LIFE!!!!!
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